GNSAD - November 2013

GNSAD - November 2013


Dear GNSAD, I have just graduated from UNE and now I’m getting very worried about what sort of career I should pursue. I have so many options, how do I know which is the best one for me?- Anonymous

The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath is about a woman with simply too many choices, at least according to the Cleo book club. She’s driven positively mad as to whether she should burn her dreams on the luke-warm fire of domestic bliss and marry the hunk Buddy, or become some sort of outrageous hysteric monster trashing every well-worn choice of the feminine sex in pursuit of her dreams. She’s so torn by these amazing choices that it drives her to depression; through the trauma of electric shock therapy and institutionalisation she eventually recovers. If your choices turn out to be that hard - don’t worry, treatment for mental illness has allegedly improved.

If you are choosing between occupations that wear a uniform I suggest you try each on and ask acquaintances to assess how plausible you look in each. If you look like you’re dressed for Halloween in all of them then it is time to broaden your horizons. Don’t sweat it too much, in this economy you’ll probably be onto something new in a few years anyway. Remember; life’s all about appearances. Fake it till you make it baby. So in short, life really isn’t that bad - the worst choices you make (in the world of career) can only lead you to medication anyway! And if you’re a woman, ever thought of getting married?*



*Editor’s note: We have finally captured the GNSAD in the gutters outside the old boiler house, posing as a stray cat. To prevent GNSAD from continuing to misbehave we had to wipe some of her memory and start replacing it from scratch. At this stage he only has the entire back catalogue of Cleo, Cosmopolitan, and a few years of A Current Affair to cross reference for answers. We apologise and are working on it.

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